imhere2's Blog

Proud to be an American?

Is anyone proud of the way some Americans are behaving right now?  Does this reflect who we are as a people, as a nation, as a country?  Supposedly the 'greatest nation in the world', are these disgusting expressions of racism and childish displays of name-calling and tantrum-throwing really indicative of the politicians we elect to represent us?  I think some of these people have forgotten that their role isn't to flog their out-dated agenda to death in the media - or to embarrass themselves (and this country) with behavior that spoiled children who don't get their own way indulge in.

What are we really concerned about?  The sex scandals?  Who really cares who slept with whom and who knew?  There are children who need food and education and opportunity.  There are people who need medical care, who have no health insurance.  There are people who need jobs to feed their families and keep a roof over their heads.  There are senior citizens who need to be able to take care of themselves while they are able.  There are real problems out there.  Why aren't we focusing on that?

Sometimes I think that people in this country have become brainwashed by the stupid reality tv so many are addicted to.  Life ain't TV people!  You can't plan everything or have contingency plans for every single thing that happens.  Sometimes disaster hits - natural or otherwise.  Sometimes people get killed.  Sometimes there are no answers, and sometimes there is no one to throw under the bus.  Instead of all this hype about blame and entitlement and complaining and anger - wouldn't it be better to use that energy to SOLVE the problem and get the work done or get past the incident and learn from it?  Merely sitting around and expecting that everything must somehow magically 'work out' is a sure formula for a lot of disappointment and finger-pointing.  It's unrealistic, immature, and just plain stupid.

Let the Dust Settle...

Can you believe the hatefuless you are hearing from some people?  This doesn't represent who we are as a nation - this certainly doesn't represent the people I know.  Is it up to the rest of us to speak out against these people, or enable them with our silence?

As a youngster I was taught that sometimes we win, but sometimes we lose.  I was taught that grace in losing was just as important as grace in winning.  But this isn't about 'winning or losing' - the results of this election set a path for where we are going to go from here...  and if it works, we ALL 'win'.  And if we allow the few who behave so badly to paint us all in that hateful light, we are divided and then we ALL lose. 

We can't all agree on everything.  I get that.  And we can have some pretty heated and passionate debates on what we like or dislike; but after that, we go on to live together and work together with dignity and respect.  Is there dignity or respect in the actions of those vengeful CEOs who have started to lay people off out of spitebecause their side didn't win?  Is there dignity or respect from those companies who will not even attempt to provide health care for their employees, but who would rather hire more temps so they won't have to? 

What does that tell us about these very same rich-bitches who may have the wealth, who want to keep it that way, and who want to keep the rest of us so desperate for income that we feel forced to allow ourselves to be treated so unjustly?  This isn't about 'socialism' people - this is about the American dream: work hard, get ahead.  Slavery is behind us.  Simply doing what big massa says because he feeds and clothes you, and not being able to think otherwise and control your own future is behind us - or should have been behind us.  And now I wonder, has this way of thinking simply been running under the surface all this time?  And now that the beast has been unearthed, can it go back to where it came from, or will it grow with the light of day and spread to choke us all?  Will we be able to find the courage and the fortitude and the sense of justice to fight it like the disease it is, before it becomes an epidemic and consumes us and generations to come?

That blithering idiot with the bad hair called for revolution.  Maybe the revolution that needs to happen is against their way of thinking.  Perhaps the revolution that needs to happen is for decent, fair-thinking people to take this country back from the hate-mongers and the small-minded bigots.  I would certainly rather live in an America where our values are built on respect and tolerance and love of country, and not on how big your bank account is, or how much you can gouge out of the economy while people can't even put food on their tables.  Greed did that - and some politicians only fueled that greed for the good of a very few.

It hurts my heart to see the nastiness of some people.  I am amazed at the depth of their hate and their prejudice.  And while I try to live what I believe in the way I treat others with respect and dignity - sometimes I just have to vent...

God help us all.

Don't Ask, I Won't Tell...

I don't make conversation about politics any more, and I never ask who a person is supporting.  It seems that the freedom to have your own opinion and voice it, and stand up for it, isn't such a freedom after all.  Like so many times before, the unfortunate behavior of a few in our society presents a side of people - some of them people I thought I knew, that is shameful and disgusting.  But once revealed, is impossible to take back - and now that I have seen that side of them, like that Facebook option, I want to 'unfriend' them and stay as far away from them as possible. 

Where are decent, fair-minded people any more?  The ones who don't share your views and opinions, but who still manage to treat you with respect and dignity?  The ones who shrug and say -"well, we can't all think the same way, so you do your thing, and I will do mine..."  Just where are those freedoms we all talk about, when you can't express your opinions or choices because of abuse or damage or defacing of your property?  Is that the kind of freedom we have now?

If we could have rational discussions and conversations without the name-calling and racial slurs - if we could just practice the values and beliefs that the foundation of this country was built on, maybe we could truly be a great nation once again instead of being one big divide.  Maybe we could just all be Americans again.

Are We Truly

Politics, and in particular this election, has brought out a side of America that I wish I had never seen.  I always admired the American Spirit - strong in the face of adversity, generous in the face of disaster and emergency, wise in the guidance given to others struggling for a better life in their own countries.  There was a time when respect was given to people no matter what their color, class, or creed; and people could disagree and still get along, still treat one another like human beings.  What I have seen these past months disgusts me.

Regardless of what your political beliefs may be - never mind who you like or support, I think we have lost sight of what is for the good of the nation.  We have become petty, mean-spirited people who resort to name-calling and shows of egregious disrespect - and yes, even those who thought themselves more enlightened, might even be guilty of more than a little prejudice. 

Maybe that's why so many people are angry - not at the politics, but at themselves.  Maybe they haven't come as far as they thought.  Perhaps this whole thing has shown us that the title 'Ugly American' acurately describes more of us than we would like to admit.  Hey - I didn't make up that title - but I think it applies very, very well to a whole lot of people today.  And that is very sad indeed.

Garbage Media

Is it my imagination, or has journalism gone to hell?  'Rumors'.  'Sources' - UN-named sources.  Are there any investigated and proved facts being reported any more?  And we continue to swallow all this drivel as though it were fact.  As if it were true.  Then, when the TRUTH comes out - we're still clinging to the lies.  To the sensationalism.

Sometimes I think we deserve all that is happening.  We've lost the ability to think.  It's disgusting.

'At Seventeen'

Do you remember that song by Janis Ian?  Every time I hear it on the radio it touches a part of me I wish I could shut down.

I've been thinking a lot about my young days.  I can't understand why it is that the painful parts are the most vivid - that I can seem to dismiss a lot of the good things, but always focus on the things that made me feel bad, feel sad, feel worse about myself.

Teenagers are cruel beasts.  I still cringe at the things that people said and did when I was a teenager.  I wasn't one of the 'popular' girls.  I didn't have the trendy clothes or the cool accessories.  I wore home-made clothes and very often shared my stuff with my 3 younger sisters.  I got fair grades, and the sisters at the Catholic school I attended from Kindgergarten through High school knew my family well, so I didn't get into any trouble on purpose.  I lived a pretty sheltered life - and only heard about things like boyfriends and petting and sex and recreational drugs through the other 'cool' kids.  The lyrics of the Janis Ian song read like a testimony of my life.

It was a lot of years and self-analysis that separated me from that teenage girl.  I got married, had kids of my own, had a pretty successful career in several fields, ran a comfortable home, maintained friendships that were more than just superficial.  I went through your average crises - losing loved ones, my husband's mid-life crises and subsequent infidelities, moving away and starting over on my own; but I managed, and I think I did pretty well.  I didn't turn to drugs or alcohol, I didn't have any major melt-downs.  I sought therapy and 'found myself' again.

But how easy it is to slip back to those days in the song. 

I was browsing Facebook and saw the name of one of the girls I knew from school.  Morbid curiosity made me click on her link - and there unfurled the list of her friends...  the same ones who tormented me in high school.  The same ones who always seemed to embody everything I wished I could be but painfully was not.  And all the old feelings of inferiority and isolation flooded over me.  A 50-something woman feeling yet again like her name had not been chosen for the team.  Silly, isn't it?  The damage that can be done to your psyche by simple, thoughtless things that other people do.  And sometimes it isn't even done on purpose or by design - just without thinking.  Without foreseeing the consequences that might befall others by our own actions.

I'm gonna listen to that song just one time - and think about the girl I used to be.  And maybe even feel a little sorry for her; but not for long.  Because I love my life - and I am proud of the woman I have become.  All those things, all those memories, all that hurt have contributed to that.  I guess it really wasn't all it seemed when I was 17. 

February : Life changes

I never thought I would go back to school.  It was always a dream of mine, but I didn't think I had the nerve or the knowledge.  But things change, and I think our own resolve changes with it, so here I am, enrolled in a college class for the Spring semester.

And life goes on...  and time passes.  Things seem the same and yet they are ever-changing.  I don't know whether that is reassuring, or deeply bitter-sweet.

The Fleeting Days of January

Where does the time go?  One day runs into the other, the weeks seem to run into the weekend, and the weekends seem to be gone in a blink...

If only there wasn't the unpleasantness of politics.  These rich-bitch politicians who have NO clue as to what it is like for the rest of us just trying to get by; playing the blame game and using their wealth to obtain more power and prestige to help themselves, their cronies, and their own selfish interests while the rest of us flounder in the deep.

Ah life...  as my aunt used to say, it's tough, brutal, and short.  Yet we persevere.

Happy days all.

Same Life, Different Year?

So...  it's only day 2 of 2012, so maybe I need to give it a little more time to see if anything will change, though I seriously doubt it. After all, life is what it is no matter what day it is, or even what year it is.  Perhaps we fool ourselves that a change in the digit of a year is going to make any substantial difference to our will power, to our career, to our love life, to our fortunes.  That's why I stopped having those expectations a long time ago.  Now I just mourn the passage of time, those we lost, things we lost - and look apprehensively to the next block of time that will bring pretty much the same.  Oh it's not as bad as it sounds...  I'm just feeling a little down today.  It will pass. 

A Wish For You All...

On this New Year’s Eve
and the whole year through,
I hope the kindness
you give to others
be returned many times to you.

Happy New Year!

Blessings for the Season...

Whether you are celebrating with family, friends, or alone - my Christmas wish for you is good health, peace, joy, and love to light your way.  May you touch the lives of others with kindess.

Best wishes!

Is it looking like Christmas yet?

Not to me.  I can't seem to find the energy to put up a decoration or buy a tree.  In my head there are lists of lists I have to make, of things I have to do.  Before I know it, it's going to be Dec 26th - and I will have run out of time.  What is wrong with me!?  I know I have stuff to do...  I just can't get started.


Any Shred of Blessing - Dec 08

My son passed all his classes this semester.  I am so proud of him, cos I know how hard he works.

Please Pardon My Little Rant...

There is something so wrong with working so damn hard and not being able to see where I'm going.  I don't ask for anything.  I work my ass of seven days a week at 2 jobs.  I pay my bills on time. I do without.  I budget.  I plan.  I sacrifice.  And for what?  So the bank can keep screwing me over my mortgage - not work with me to ensure that I can KEEP paying my bills.  Keep living in my house.  I don't throw anybody under the bus to get ahead at work.  I show up every day and do my share and then some.  I'm always watching my back for those who will throw me under the bus to get ahead.  I'm tired of saying to my kids 'I can't afford this' or getting on their cases about 'wasting' money on stuff they want.  They are not demanding or unreasonable.  They are not materialistic or greedy.  And when I say no, they accept it gracefully and tell me they understand.  Sometimes they don't even ask for anything any more.  My son has a little part-time job after school, and he brings me his paycheck to 'help pay the bills'. 

And I look out at people who waste what they have.  Who are so selfish that they only care about themselves and what they want.  And I wonder to myself if consciences are only for the poor.  It's not that I begrudge them their riches - I suppose many of them earned it or inherited it...  but to those who have more is expected.  Shouldn't there be some rule about helping those who need it?  I mean REALLY need it?

I'm getting angrier every day.  And I can't do a damn thing about it.  It doesn't really matter in the end.  As a person who is not rich in America today - I'm invisible.  Just another faceless soul trudging through the mire of struggle and frustration and near-desperation.

People have become so hateful to one another - politics isn't what runs our county any more, but what drives the hate and division that has split us, perhaps irrevocably.  This hatred has made many people lose sight of their purpose - made them irresponsible and irrational.  And their actions hurt and harm us all even if we don't realize it because we have been blinded by this viciousness.  Those people who are supposed to be responsible to us, the people, are rich - are not feeling the day-to-day pressure that we are feeling.  They don't care.  And neither, it seems, do we.

I feel like I want to scream my head off...  but what's the use?  I'd just be screaming into the wind - a wind that is howling all around me - sucking up the cries of those like me who are screaming into the wind too. I feel battered, torn, defeated, hopeless.  I'm so tired.  I'm so damn tired.

Especially Today's Shred(s) of Blessing - 11/24

I am so thankful.  May I remember every day how loved I am by my family and my friends, and how much I love them.  I am grateful for everything I have,, everything I am - and I know that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Today's Shred of Blessing - 11/20

You know, I am so thankful for my family - and for the moments of joy that I feel when we are together. I wish I could always feel as peaceful as I do when I am with them!

Today's Shred(s) of Blessing - 11/16

1.   It's Wednesday, Hump Day!
2.   I have great kids
3.   My sisters
4.   Tomorrow is payday

Golly I have a lot to be grateful for!!!!

It's Coming... Find Things to be Thankful For!

In the spirit of the coming holiday, I am getting ready to be thankful, no matter what it takes.  I am thankful for the good things, no matter how few or far between they are; but I am also learning how to appreciate the not-so-good things.  The things I used to see as hardships, or problems.  I remind myself that I wouldn't be the person I am today if it wasn't for those experiences...  and I think I have turned out ok.  Far from perfect, and always beating myself up for the things I didn't do, couldn't do, failed at...  but here I am.  And I'm thankful, or at least I try always to be.

Today's Shred of Blessing - 11/14

I am strong.  This always passes.

Today's Shred of Blessing 11/13

Another beautiful day - and the will to keep on going.

1-20 of 36 Blogs   

Previous Posts
Proud to be an American?, posted November 17th, 2012, 4 comments
Let the Dust Settle..., posted November 10th, 2012
Don't Ask, I Won't Tell..., posted November 4th, 2012
Are We Truly, posted October 23rd, 2012
Garbage Media, posted March 3rd, 2012
'At Seventeen', posted February 26th, 2012
February : Life changes, posted February 17th, 2012
The Fleeting Days of January, posted January 21st, 2012
Same Life, Different Year?, posted January 2nd, 2012
A Wish For You All..., posted December 31st, 2011
Blessings for the Season..., posted December 18th, 2011
Is it looking like Christmas yet?, posted December 12th, 2011
Any Shred of Blessing - Dec 08, posted December 8th, 2011
Please Pardon My Little Rant..., posted November 30th, 2011
Especially Today's Shred(s) of Blessing - 11/24, posted November 24th, 2011
Today's Shred of Blessing - 11/20, posted November 20th, 2011
Today's Shred(s) of Blessing - 11/16, posted November 16th, 2011
It's Coming... Find Things to be Thankful For!, posted November 15th, 2011
Today's Shred of Blessing - 11/14, posted November 14th, 2011
Today's Shred of Blessing 11/13, posted November 13th, 2011
Today's Shred of Blessing - 11/11, posted November 11th, 2011
Today's Shred(s) of Blessing - 11/10, posted November 10th, 2011
Any Shred of Blessing - The Concept, posted November 9th, 2011
Something in the Air..., posted November 5th, 2011
In My Dreams, posted October 30th, 2011
A Fleeting Glimpse of Joy, posted October 29th, 2011
The blinking Cursor, posted October 28th, 2011
Life Just Keeps on Churning..., posted October 15th, 2011
If Life is a Song, What Happened to the Music?, posted September 28th, 2011
When You Reach the End of the Rope..., posted September 24th, 2011
Homesick..., posted September 12th, 2011
I Remember..., posted September 10th, 2011
When Nobody's Listening..., posted September 3rd, 2011
Why I'm Afraid of Dying..., posted August 27th, 2011
Because There Are Some Things You Can't Take Back..., posted August 21st, 2011
Alone, posted July 30th, 2011, 1 comment

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